Adopting Your Stepchild In Pennsylvania: A Heartfelt Path To Legal Parenthood

In this article, you can discover…

• The emotions that come with stepparent adoption.
• How attorney Deborah Lesko supports stepparents who are nervous about the process.
• How children are involved in the stepparent adoption process.

What Inspires Families To Begin The Journey Of Stepparent Adoption?

In most stepparent adoptions, the journey begins because the stepparent has already found themselves stepping into that parenting role and filling a gap that was left by an absent biological parent.

For example, let’s say a biological mother has two children from a previous relationship and later marries. If the biological father has abandoned the children (providing no contact, no support, and no presence), then the stepfather often becomes the one who provides that love, structure, and support over the years.

Other times, the stepparent has been in the child’s life since they were two or three years old. In those cases, the child may only know the stepparent as “Mom” or “Dad.” Sometimes they don’t even know they have another parent. At that point, the legal adoption is simply a formality to legalize a relationship already in place.

There are also instances where families may want to sever ties with an absent or uninvolved biological parent. But more often than not, the motivation comes from love, not rejection. It’s about honoring the parent who’s been there with love and support.

Stepparent adoptions may seem straightforward on paper, but they’re deeply emotional. It doesn’t matter if it’s an adult or a child. In a recent case I worked on, two adults were being adopted by their stepfather, and everyone was in tears of pure joy by the end of the hearing. It was beautiful.

How Do You Support Stepparents Who Are Nervous About The Legal And Emotional Complexities Of Adopting A Stepchild?

As with every adoption, I explain upfront that stepparent adoption is a two-step process. The first step is to terminate the rights of the other biological parent, which is usually the birth father in these cases: However, if the child being adopted has attained age 18 years, then this step is not required. Step two is the adoption itself, but that can only move forward after the first step is complete.

The most significant legal hurdle for a stepparent adoption is always understanding the biological parent’s likely attitude toward the adoption. You have to determine if they’re someone who is likely to agree to the adoption, or someone who still has an ongoing relationship with the child and may contest the termination of their parental rights.

If the birth parent fights the termination of their parental rights, then the next question is whether there are legal grounds for us to request that termination through the courts. In Pennsylvania, there are specific criteria we have to meet in order for this to happen. One of the most common is a six-month period of abandonment, meaning no contact, no visits, no phone calls, and no reasonable excuse for the biological parent’s lack of effort.

But if the biological parent is still involved in their child’s life, then it may be difficult, if not impossible, to move forward with the termination. That’s often where you need to sit down and have a very honest conversation.

Once you get past the termination of parental rights, the rest of the process is typically smooth. But that first hurdle is where most of the emotional and legal uncertainty lies. As your attorney, it’s my job to guide your family through the process with honesty, compassion, and a clear understanding of what’s possible and what isn’t.

For over four decades, attorney Deborah Lesko has worked closely with stepparents across Pennsylvania, helping them to legalize the bonds they’ve already built with their stepchildren. With her empathy, trust, and clarity, she will help you navigate through the process of stepparent adoption so you can proceed forward with confidence and love.

Still have questions? Ready to get started? Contact The Law and Mediation Offices of Deborah L. Lesko, P.C., today to schedule an initial consultation.

CONTACT US - (412) 276-4200

How Are Children Involved In The Stepparent Adoption Process In Pennsylvania?

It really depends on the age of the child. For example, if you’re talking about a three-year-old, they’re not going to have much of an opinion on or an understanding of what’s happening. But if the child is older, say 14, they will absolutely understand what’s going on and will have a say in the process. In fact, in Pennsylvania, any child 12 or older must sign a consent form and testify in court that they want the stepparent adoption to go forward.

I had a case not too long ago with a 14-year-old boy who had to testify. When I asked if he understood what the adoption meant, he said, “Yeah, my dad’s going to be my real dad on paper.” I asked him why he wanted it, why it mattered. He looked right at the judge and said, “Because I love him so much. He’s always there for me. I can talk to him about everything.” You could feel the emotion surge through the entire courtroom.

That kind of genuine love is what makes these adoptions so powerful.

When it comes to children under 12, I always ask the biological parent and stepparent if they’ve discussed the situation with their child. Sometimes I hear, “Well, our 11-year-old doesn’t even know his stepfather isn’t his biological dad.” Which opens up a whole different conversation.

That’s why it’s important to understand the emotional and psychological side of the process and not just the legal steps. A stepparent adoption is much more than paperwork. It’s about honoring the child’s emotional well-being and making sure it’s truly in their best interest.

Does The Court Use Best Interest Factors When Deciding Whether To Approve A Stepparent Adoption?

In every adoption case, the court must determine whether the adoption is in the best interest of the child. That’s genuinely the guiding principle. In stepparent adoptions, this often means the court has to weigh the impact of severing a legal relationship with the biological parent and what effect that might eventually have on the child.

For example, let’s say the biological father hasn’t been very present, but there’s still some emotional connection. If a 13-year-old is questioned and says something to the effect of, “I love my dad. He’s not always around, but I know he loves me,” the judge may decide that even if there are grounds to terminate the father’s rights, doing so could be detrimental to the child.

Every case is different, and that’s why it’s so important to review all the facts and take the proper time to evaluate not just the legal grounds but also the emotional ones, too.

Advice For A Biological Parent Considering Stepparent Adoption For Their Child

I think there are two critical perspectives for a biological parent considering stepparent adoption for their child. First, from a legal standpoint, I strongly recommend you speak with an attorney before taking any steps.

Sometimes stepparents mean well and might take actions that could actually harm the adoption case by creating unnecessary obstacles, like preventing the birth father from communicating with his child. Even if you believe it’s in the child’s best interest not to speak with the biological father, blocking communication can backfire tremendously on you.

Second, on the emotional side, both the biological parent and the stepparent really need to make sure they are closely attuned to what is truly best for the child. What’s best will depend on the age of the child, the relationship, etc., but it’s important to make that a priority. Sometimes talking to a family therapist can be a huge help and provide valuable insight.

Still Have Questions? Ready To Get Started?

For more information on stepchild adoption in Pennsylvania, an initial consultation is your next best step. Get the information and legal answers you are seeking by calling (412) 276-4200 today.